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enemyofperfectHaving an anxiety disorder is like juggling angry weasels.
It's like juggling angry weasels all the time. And okay, it turns out that with enough practice, you can get pretty good at anything, even weasel-juggling? But that doesn't mean it doesn't make things difficult.
Like, you can never just pick up a book and read it. Instead it has to be, okay, all three weasels up in the air, time to turn the page and quick catch the weasels again -- yes, excellent, weasels successfully caught! Now read a paragraph. Now look up to make sure the weasels aren't writhing out of control. Good, good. Now read another few paragraphs -- whoops, and there we are with the writhing, damn it, weasels!
( cut for metaphorical weasel violence and all-caps cursing )
Or like you're talking to someone and they're saying something and their sentence ends, "...so what do you think?" And you think, there are at least three things in there I want to address, and the first of them is -- really, with the teeth, weasel, did you honestly have to -- the first of them is that -- oh, so now you're trying to escape? And now you're all trying to escape, thank you, that's exactly what I needed, and don't even pretend you won't feast on our ankles if I let you go, because we've been here before and I know your ways -- but getting back to my train of thought, the first and probably most important thing to mention here is that-- And then you just give up and say, "I'm sorry, I really don't know if I can offer much of an opinion." Which of course is true, but -- even so.
Or maybe one of the worst is if someone's just like "hey, could you pass me the thing, that one by your elbow right there?" And you're like, "sure, I will do that in one moment, I just need to be careful so that I don't OH FUCK I DID IT, I'M SO SORRY, I PASSED YOU AN ANGRY WEASEL BY MISTAKE, I WAS TRYING NOT TO DO IT BUT I DID. Oh fucking weasel hell -- please let me help you pry it off your face?"
I hate it when I accidentally let one of my weasels gnaw on someone else's face. My weasels are my responsibility. They shouldn't be chewing on anyone other than me! And not even me, preferably -- hence the ongoing parlor trick with the hand-eye coordination and the attempts to minimize mustelid-inflicted bloodshed.
But even when I do have the weasels mostly under control, it's just--
Sometimes I just get so tired of all the juggling.
(h/t tostaranise -- lexicon -- and Joss Whedon -- episode context and quote)
It's like juggling angry weasels all the time. And okay, it turns out that with enough practice, you can get pretty good at anything, even weasel-juggling? But that doesn't mean it doesn't make things difficult.
Like, you can never just pick up a book and read it. Instead it has to be, okay, all three weasels up in the air, time to turn the page and quick catch the weasels again -- yes, excellent, weasels successfully caught! Now read a paragraph. Now look up to make sure the weasels aren't writhing out of control. Good, good. Now read another few paragraphs -- whoops, and there we are with the writhing, damn it, weasels!
( cut for metaphorical weasel violence and all-caps cursing )
Or like you're talking to someone and they're saying something and their sentence ends, "...so what do you think?" And you think, there are at least three things in there I want to address, and the first of them is -- really, with the teeth, weasel, did you honestly have to -- the first of them is that -- oh, so now you're trying to escape? And now you're all trying to escape, thank you, that's exactly what I needed, and don't even pretend you won't feast on our ankles if I let you go, because we've been here before and I know your ways -- but getting back to my train of thought, the first and probably most important thing to mention here is that-- And then you just give up and say, "I'm sorry, I really don't know if I can offer much of an opinion." Which of course is true, but -- even so.
Or maybe one of the worst is if someone's just like "hey, could you pass me the thing, that one by your elbow right there?" And you're like, "sure, I will do that in one moment, I just need to be careful so that I don't OH FUCK I DID IT, I'M SO SORRY, I PASSED YOU AN ANGRY WEASEL BY MISTAKE, I WAS TRYING NOT TO DO IT BUT I DID. Oh fucking weasel hell -- please let me help you pry it off your face?"
I hate it when I accidentally let one of my weasels gnaw on someone else's face. My weasels are my responsibility. They shouldn't be chewing on anyone other than me! And not even me, preferably -- hence the ongoing parlor trick with the hand-eye coordination and the attempts to minimize mustelid-inflicted bloodshed.
But even when I do have the weasels mostly under control, it's just--
Sometimes I just get so tired of all the juggling.
(h/t to
staranise -- lexicon -- and Joss Whedon -- episode context and quote)
no subject
Date: 2013-09-20 10:46 am (UTC)A NEED FOR SPEED
no subject
Date: 2013-09-20 11:03 am (UTC)My boundless love for all living beings compels me to sympathize with the small non-metaphorical mammals your (adorable & precious, obvs) dogs are heartlessly slaughtering, but I am also so sheltered that despite the clear inconvenience these heedless deer present, I am all like OMG YOU SEE DEER ALL THE TIME??? THAT'S SO AWESOME I SEE DEER HARDLY EVER :D :D :D :D
Sleep deprivation is awesome, except for the part where it's really not, but your comments are clearly brilliant, so that's a real point in its favor, I feel.
baby sloths fall out of trees sometimez b/c mistakes happen and they're too slow to catch themselves
Date: 2013-09-20 11:18 am (UTC)seriously deer can go fuck themselves. Josh says he used to be confused as to why everyone in Iowa referred to them like they were just giant rats and now he understands :D :D :D
well, tonight's sleep deprivation IS my fault, i went to bed forgetting i'd told leigh (
but the general sleep deprivation is NOT my fault! it's the fault of the fibromyawesome. (no? no. sigh. trying out new words for it.)
I think falling out of trees in slow motion is the story of my entire life
Date: 2013-09-21 11:06 am (UTC)Honestly, I'm not sure how you could deny your dogs the pleasure of accidentally breaking small meat-creatures even if you wanted to; I mean, I couldn't even keep my dog from eating rocks.
Sleep deprivation is seriously terrible (if sometimes hilarious) and you will ALWAYS have my sympathy, whether or not it's quote-unquote your fault. D:
Argh, what is sleep, though? How does it work? I mean right now -- okay, right now I need to shower and go to bed -- but I'm operating on something like eight solid hours of sleep, and mostly I feel sort of congealed. Whereas yesterday I had two naps in the 2-3 hr range and I seem to remember feeling... somewhat more alive? I just feel like this is weird. And/or unjust.