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enemyofperfectThe world in general and the US in particular do not seem to be having a very good time right now, and neither, really, am I. But there are a few ways I've been dealing with the stress of living in a handbasket that might or might not be on its way to hell, and I thought it might be interesting to list them!
Number one: hiding. I'm not sure this is a very good method of dealing with my feelings of chronic overwhelm, but it's definitely one that I'm using. I've been posting and commenting less here, I've fallen farther behind on email, and I'm increasingly faced with the fact that if I don't take a week off from DMing online D&D at least once every month, I will burn myself out into a crispy useless shell of my former self. This is something I keep feeling disappointed and sometimes guilty about, because I want to talk to people, and I definitely don't want to let anyone down... but at the same time, I am so tired. I feel like I'm tired almost all of the time. So what energy I have gets rationed.
Number two: getting political. 2016 was the year I started calling my elected representatives, and 2020 turns out to be the year I started sending texts to strangers asking them to vote and writing snail mail letters to do the same thing.
I was very anxious when I started text banking, and it didn't reassure me when I made a mistake with the very first text I answered, but once I got the hang of it, it's turned out to be surprisingly doable, and even invigorating in a way. A lot of people ask to be taken off the list, but I've gone from feeling bad about bothering them to feeling good about the fact that I can do that -- I can make sure their request is handled appropriately and the campaign won't contact them again! And there are also a lot of people who have already voted, or who plan to vote, and even some who thank me for the work I'm doing -- and I've been able to help a few people find information they need, too. It isn't always easy, and in the two weeks I've been doing this I've come across a couple of nasty trolls, but... for me, it's something I can do. And that means a lot, right now.
The letter writing I got into very late -- actually just last night, after they'd already passed the 15 million mark, and the mail date is tomorrow, so I have my work cut out for me to do as much as I can today! But it's weirdly comforting, almost, to put down in words what voting means to me, and to think that it might encourage someone else. And that means a lot to me, too.
Number three: adopting cats!!! I don't, of course, recommend this as a short term pandemic stress response, because having cats in your home is not the kind of hobby you can just pick up and drop again when your circumstances change. (Although cat fostering might come a little bit closer to being that, now that I think of it, and I know shelters and rescues are always looking for foster homes.) But it's been more than five years since we said goodbye to our last cat, and we'd been missing having furry ones in the house more and more as time went on, and finally about six weeks ago the balance just tipped over, and somehow we went from vaguely considering the possibility to adopting a pair of adult cats from the local shelter in just a couple of days.
And I love them both so much!!! One of them has gorgeous green eyes and murmurs constantly in a melodious voice when she's asking for attention and scampers around in such a way that I've started calling her my gremlin, and the other has huge round eyes and will pat imploringly at my leg when he's hungry and is just skittish enough that I've decided he is our cryptid. They're somewhere in the vicinity of four to six years old, we think -- their last human passed away, and we don't know a lot about their life before we met them, but they're beautiful and affectionate and playful and inconvenient and amazing.
They were much more timid to start out than the kittens I've known before -- it took several days for them to trust us enough to let us get close enough to pet them, and after the way they were shuttled from their home to the busy shelter to our house, I don't blame them. But ever since they had a chance to get used to us, they've been just so good -- I've never known a pair of cats that loved having their tummies rubbed half as much as they do, or that seemed to downright enjoy being brushed, or who were nearly so placid about having their paws handled and their nails trimmed.
The more I get to know them, the more I think that their first human must have been very good to them, and loved them very much. I don't know anything about the person who taught them to be so happy and feel so safe, but I feel very grateful to them, and even though there would have been no reason for us to ever meet if they'd lived longer and been able to keep their cats, I'm still sorry I never got to know them.
Of course, introducing new living creatures into the household does inevitably introduce a few difficulties as well. Although the cats are clearly familiar with each other, there's also a very clear hierarchy, in which the gremlin will brazenly steal her brother's food -- which inspires him to steal hers -- and try to discourage him from seeking human attention when she's there to enjoy it herself, apparently feeling that all good things belong by right exclusively to her. They both have a terrible habit of scooping their litter right out of the pan -- I had a chance to observe the cryptid recently, and I'm sure he sends it flying a full foot up into the air. And the more comfortable they both get in their new home, the more they feel comfortable playing with, for example, phone charger cables, which we will absolutely have to find a way to prevent them from making a habit of.
But these problems are so infinitely superior in every way to the larger problems that I would otherwise be fretting over every hour of the day that I'm almost grateful to them for being impossible little monsters, as well as for everything else. They make my life so much better just by existing and being themselves and by enjoying my company. And I'm so glad that we're able to give them a home.
How has life been treating the rest of you?
Number one: hiding. I'm not sure this is a very good method of dealing with my feelings of chronic overwhelm, but it's definitely one that I'm using. I've been posting and commenting less here, I've fallen farther behind on email, and I'm increasingly faced with the fact that if I don't take a week off from DMing online D&D at least once every month, I will burn myself out into a crispy useless shell of my former self. This is something I keep feeling disappointed and sometimes guilty about, because I want to talk to people, and I definitely don't want to let anyone down... but at the same time, I am so tired. I feel like I'm tired almost all of the time. So what energy I have gets rationed.
Number two: getting political. 2016 was the year I started calling my elected representatives, and 2020 turns out to be the year I started sending texts to strangers asking them to vote and writing snail mail letters to do the same thing.
I was very anxious when I started text banking, and it didn't reassure me when I made a mistake with the very first text I answered, but once I got the hang of it, it's turned out to be surprisingly doable, and even invigorating in a way. A lot of people ask to be taken off the list, but I've gone from feeling bad about bothering them to feeling good about the fact that I can do that -- I can make sure their request is handled appropriately and the campaign won't contact them again! And there are also a lot of people who have already voted, or who plan to vote, and even some who thank me for the work I'm doing -- and I've been able to help a few people find information they need, too. It isn't always easy, and in the two weeks I've been doing this I've come across a couple of nasty trolls, but... for me, it's something I can do. And that means a lot, right now.
The letter writing I got into very late -- actually just last night, after they'd already passed the 15 million mark, and the mail date is tomorrow, so I have my work cut out for me to do as much as I can today! But it's weirdly comforting, almost, to put down in words what voting means to me, and to think that it might encourage someone else. And that means a lot to me, too.
Number three: adopting cats!!! I don't, of course, recommend this as a short term pandemic stress response, because having cats in your home is not the kind of hobby you can just pick up and drop again when your circumstances change. (Although cat fostering might come a little bit closer to being that, now that I think of it, and I know shelters and rescues are always looking for foster homes.) But it's been more than five years since we said goodbye to our last cat, and we'd been missing having furry ones in the house more and more as time went on, and finally about six weeks ago the balance just tipped over, and somehow we went from vaguely considering the possibility to adopting a pair of adult cats from the local shelter in just a couple of days.
And I love them both so much!!! One of them has gorgeous green eyes and murmurs constantly in a melodious voice when she's asking for attention and scampers around in such a way that I've started calling her my gremlin, and the other has huge round eyes and will pat imploringly at my leg when he's hungry and is just skittish enough that I've decided he is our cryptid. They're somewhere in the vicinity of four to six years old, we think -- their last human passed away, and we don't know a lot about their life before we met them, but they're beautiful and affectionate and playful and inconvenient and amazing.
They were much more timid to start out than the kittens I've known before -- it took several days for them to trust us enough to let us get close enough to pet them, and after the way they were shuttled from their home to the busy shelter to our house, I don't blame them. But ever since they had a chance to get used to us, they've been just so good -- I've never known a pair of cats that loved having their tummies rubbed half as much as they do, or that seemed to downright enjoy being brushed, or who were nearly so placid about having their paws handled and their nails trimmed.
The more I get to know them, the more I think that their first human must have been very good to them, and loved them very much. I don't know anything about the person who taught them to be so happy and feel so safe, but I feel very grateful to them, and even though there would have been no reason for us to ever meet if they'd lived longer and been able to keep their cats, I'm still sorry I never got to know them.
Of course, introducing new living creatures into the household does inevitably introduce a few difficulties as well. Although the cats are clearly familiar with each other, there's also a very clear hierarchy, in which the gremlin will brazenly steal her brother's food -- which inspires him to steal hers -- and try to discourage him from seeking human attention when she's there to enjoy it herself, apparently feeling that all good things belong by right exclusively to her. They both have a terrible habit of scooping their litter right out of the pan -- I had a chance to observe the cryptid recently, and I'm sure he sends it flying a full foot up into the air. And the more comfortable they both get in their new home, the more they feel comfortable playing with, for example, phone charger cables, which we will absolutely have to find a way to prevent them from making a habit of.
But these problems are so infinitely superior in every way to the larger problems that I would otherwise be fretting over every hour of the day that I'm almost grateful to them for being impossible little monsters, as well as for everything else. They make my life so much better just by existing and being themselves and by enjoying my company. And I'm so glad that we're able to give them a home.
How has life been treating the rest of you?
no subject
Date: 2020-11-22 07:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-11-23 03:41 am (UTC)