![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
enemyofperfect 101
May. 19th, 2012 06:38 amenemyofperfectOn a site that consists largely of people wandering in and out of each other's digital living rooms, it seems sensible to provide some sort of rudimentary guide to who I am. And since one of the living rooms in question is after all mine, I should probably try to give a general idea of what visitors here can expect. Therefore, without further ado:
Some Things About Me
Hi there! I'menemyofperfect. Nice to meet you!
Probably the most important thing to mention is that I'm socially anxious like whoa. I do my best to manage that, and I try not to take on more interaction than I can handle, but if I seem to be getting frayed, or take a while to respond to something, emotional overload may be part of why. This does not at all mean that you shouldn't talk to me -- I want to talk to people! I just also realize that I may, at times, be bad at it, or need to take a breather before continuing on.
(Sidebar: This also means that if you should at any point feel anxious, shy, or otherwise hesitant about any aspect of talking to me, I am extraordinarily likely to sympathize -- so if mentioning it, or asking for any kind of reassurance, would be at all helpful, please feel free! I think I can promise absolutely that I will not bite.)
In addition to the anxiety, I have OCD, which I'm basically mostly bored by at this point; a history of depression, which is somewhat more interesting, given that at its worst it involved not only suicidal ideation, but also some very quiet psychosis; and a generous assortment of other mental quirks I don't have quite as good a handle on, but that probably includes some degree of dissociation. Perhaps unsurprisingly, I think psychology's a pretty interesting topic.
As for more general trivia, let's see. I'm in my mid-twenties; white; USian; able-bodied; working on seeing my mental health issues as a valid disability; living with my parents; strongly atheist and generally skeptical, but not anti-religion, or otherwise inclined to attack any belief system valued by those who hold it simply because I'm not one of their number; vegan, but not evangelical about it; geeky; fannish; feminist; and, um...
...questioning my gender kind of intensely at the moment. Gender-neutral pronouns (e.g., "ze", "they") gratefully accepted; thank you for your consideration. My orientation isn't quite as much of an open question as my gender currently is -- pretty sure I'm not aromantic, pretty sure I'm attracted to women -- and is, for the time being, a largely academic one, so by comparison, it is positively relaxing to contemplate.
What else? I'm possibly overly fond of the Myers-Briggs personality types, and am probably about as much of an INFP as it's possible to be. I'm semi-nocturnal, and tend to use the words "night" and "morning" rather loosely. I care passionately about stories and may someday even write some down.
Okay, that seems like enough to start out with.
And Also Some Things About This Journal
This journal may contain any or all of the following:
Comments are always welcome: short comments, long comments, thinky comments, comments consisting entirely of acronyms, complimentary comments, contradictory comments, curious comments, FYI-your-privilege-is-showing comments, happy comments, unhappy comments, anonymous comments, and pretty much any kind of comment that isn't actively cruel or discriminatory. In general, I'm anti-deletion and pro-learning: I always cringe a little when someone deletes a comment or a post, but I think that graceful apologies and ETAs are things of beauty and worth, so if someone else says something they regret, I'd rather they acknowledge it and move forward than try to erase it from the record -- and if you think there's something I ought to hear, I'm interested in listening.
As an added note, while I care about addressing any kind of fail on my part, accessibility fail is something I will try particularly hard to rectify. It's bad enough to say objectionable things, but if people are prevented from even accessing the content in the first place, that's an even more fundamental problem, and an especially important one to solve.
Anyone can subscribe or unsubscribe to this journal at any point without needing to worry that I'll be shocked or outraged. Hellos are nice, but not mandatory, and if I have a burning question about a change, I'll ask. I don't currently anticipate that I'll be making a lot of locked posts -- if something isn't visible, it's probably wholly private, either a personal memo or a draft -- but for now, I'm granting access on a reciprocal basis, because it appeals to my sense of symmetry.
I'm not sure how to express the last thing I want to say, but maybe it's something like this: I take it as a favor to be given the opportunity to do well by other people. I'm very far from perfect -- and in addition to all the things I can't do, there are many others that I won't -- but if there's something I could do or do differently that you would appreciate or benefit from in any way, even if it feels weird or silly or needy to ask for it, I'd be glad if you felt like you could ask. I might say no -- or I might say yes, but have mixed success at applying it -- but that would be about my limitations and choices, and not at all because asking was wrong.
Life being a constant work in progress, most of the above is subject to change, and if any of it's unclear, or you have any other questions, feel free to let me know; but for now, that seems to be what I can think of to say.
Edited to add: An updated version of this post can be found here!
Some Things About Me
Hi there! I'm
enemyofperfect. Nice to meet you!Probably the most important thing to mention is that I'm socially anxious like whoa. I do my best to manage that, and I try not to take on more interaction than I can handle, but if I seem to be getting frayed, or take a while to respond to something, emotional overload may be part of why. This does not at all mean that you shouldn't talk to me -- I want to talk to people! I just also realize that I may, at times, be bad at it, or need to take a breather before continuing on.
(Sidebar: This also means that if you should at any point feel anxious, shy, or otherwise hesitant about any aspect of talking to me, I am extraordinarily likely to sympathize -- so if mentioning it, or asking for any kind of reassurance, would be at all helpful, please feel free! I think I can promise absolutely that I will not bite.)
In addition to the anxiety, I have OCD, which I'm basically mostly bored by at this point; a history of depression, which is somewhat more interesting, given that at its worst it involved not only suicidal ideation, but also some very quiet psychosis; and a generous assortment of other mental quirks I don't have quite as good a handle on, but that probably includes some degree of dissociation. Perhaps unsurprisingly, I think psychology's a pretty interesting topic.
As for more general trivia, let's see. I'm in my mid-twenties; white; USian; able-bodied; working on seeing my mental health issues as a valid disability; living with my parents; strongly atheist and generally skeptical, but not anti-religion, or otherwise inclined to attack any belief system valued by those who hold it simply because I'm not one of their number; vegan, but not evangelical about it; geeky; fannish; feminist; and, um...
...questioning my gender kind of intensely at the moment. Gender-neutral pronouns (e.g., "ze", "they") gratefully accepted; thank you for your consideration. My orientation isn't quite as much of an open question as my gender currently is -- pretty sure I'm not aromantic, pretty sure I'm attracted to women -- and is, for the time being, a largely academic one, so by comparison, it is positively relaxing to contemplate.
What else? I'm possibly overly fond of the Myers-Briggs personality types, and am probably about as much of an INFP as it's possible to be. I'm semi-nocturnal, and tend to use the words "night" and "morning" rather loosely. I care passionately about stories and may someday even write some down.
Okay, that seems like enough to start out with.
And Also Some Things About This Journal
This journal may contain any or all of the following:
- swearing
- silliness
- sexual content
- discussion of mental illness, although I will warn for discussion of suicidal ideation
- strong opinions
- TL;DR
- social awkwardness
- fannish squee
- fannish frustration
- meta
- fanfic
- footnotes
- kink
- memes
- typos and editing artifacts, although if you'll let me know about any you spot, I'll fix them
- angst
- gender dysphoria, although I will try to remember to warn for anything very extreme
- disorganized lists
- silliness
Comments are always welcome: short comments, long comments, thinky comments, comments consisting entirely of acronyms, complimentary comments, contradictory comments, curious comments, FYI-your-privilege-is-showing comments, happy comments, unhappy comments, anonymous comments, and pretty much any kind of comment that isn't actively cruel or discriminatory. In general, I'm anti-deletion and pro-learning: I always cringe a little when someone deletes a comment or a post, but I think that graceful apologies and ETAs are things of beauty and worth, so if someone else says something they regret, I'd rather they acknowledge it and move forward than try to erase it from the record -- and if you think there's something I ought to hear, I'm interested in listening.
As an added note, while I care about addressing any kind of fail on my part, accessibility fail is something I will try particularly hard to rectify. It's bad enough to say objectionable things, but if people are prevented from even accessing the content in the first place, that's an even more fundamental problem, and an especially important one to solve.
Anyone can subscribe or unsubscribe to this journal at any point without needing to worry that I'll be shocked or outraged. Hellos are nice, but not mandatory, and if I have a burning question about a change, I'll ask. I don't currently anticipate that I'll be making a lot of locked posts -- if something isn't visible, it's probably wholly private, either a personal memo or a draft -- but for now, I'm granting access on a reciprocal basis, because it appeals to my sense of symmetry.
I'm not sure how to express the last thing I want to say, but maybe it's something like this: I take it as a favor to be given the opportunity to do well by other people. I'm very far from perfect -- and in addition to all the things I can't do, there are many others that I won't -- but if there's something I could do or do differently that you would appreciate or benefit from in any way, even if it feels weird or silly or needy to ask for it, I'd be glad if you felt like you could ask. I might say no -- or I might say yes, but have mixed success at applying it -- but that would be about my limitations and choices, and not at all because asking was wrong.
Life being a constant work in progress, most of the above is subject to change, and if any of it's unclear, or you have any other questions, feel free to let me know; but for now, that seems to be what I can think of to say.
Edited to add: An updated version of this post can be found here!
no subject
Date: 2012-05-20 03:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-20 09:09 am (UTC)