About enemyofperfect

[enemyofperfect]

Hello there! I'm enemyofperfect, variously called enemy and E by my friends. (I'm a very friendly enemy, I promise.)

I've been at least vaguely active on Dreamwidth for nearly eight years, although I think I lurked in fannish spaces for another four or so years before that, and the internet has been a huge part of my life since... 1996? -Ish? It's been a long time.

The other main places you can find me are enemyofperfect for fanworks and enemyofperfect for general assorted nonsense, but at the moment, I'm most active here.

Some basic demographic info for those interested in such things:

• in my 30s
• very definitely Not Cis
• much clearer on what my gender isn't than what it is
• they/them pronouns please
• white and making an effort to educate myself about my privilege
• US American and trying to be less of an oblivious jerk about it
• unemployed and living with my parents
• able-bodied as yet
• depressed, anxious, and OCD-ridden to varying degrees
• happily taking escitalopram (aka generic lexapro) to medicate the above
• possibly autistic? in this way where I thought that was just the rest of my family until it dawned on me that it would kind of explain a lot?
• raised Christian and personally atheist but thrilled to realize that not all religion is Like That
• mostly monolingual pero hablo un poquito de español

I'm also vegan (but don't proselytize), kind of a social sciences geek (with an emphasis on psychology and linguistics), fond of the MBTI (in much the same way some people are fond of Hogwarts Houses); and pretty much always interested in ethics. I write intermittently, draw occasionally, read constantly, watch television slowly, and play mostly the kind of indie computer games I find online for free, plus D&D once a week.

Speaking of writing and ethics: I guess I'm what you could call an anti-anti inasmuch as I think it's perfectly all right -- and sometimes very valuable -- to write about terrible things. (In fannish communities, we often label the content of such writing for readers' benefit, whether with particular warnings or simply with choose not to warn. I think this practice is very valuable, too, and I've been happy to see it spread.) At the same time, I don't believe that anything goes in fiction, or that there are no conversations to be had about the moral messages of stories. And I don't really believe in being mean to antis, either; from what I can tell, a lot of them are just scared kids.

So what do I believe? Sometimes stories carry messed up, harmful messages -- either ones their authors don't even know they're putting in there, or ones they think are okay but really aren't. I think it's important to have conversations about this, both with respect to stories written outside of fandom and about the stories we write as fans ourselves. But to be absolutely clear, when I say conversations, I don't mean spamming people with hostile messages or telling anyone to kill themself or any kind of harassment like that. I just mean that it's good to talk honestly, and perhaps with curiosity, about the things that matter to us and other people.

Whew, that's not the most fun disclaimer I've ever written. Never a dull minute on the internet, I guess. But anyway!

Anyone is welcome to subscribe or unsubscribe to this journal at any point, with or without greeting or explanation, as you prefer! I don't make a practice of locking posts, but I do grant access to people who've given it to me, because I find symmetry aesthetically pleasing.

I love hearing from people in the comments, whether briefly or at length, on new posts or old, and if you ever feel the need to tell me that I've done something hurtful, I'll do my best to listen. In general, if you ever need me to do something differently, please feel free to ask -- no request too large, small, or idiosyncratic.

Comments

[shipperslist]

Whoa. Your intro gave me Thoughts. Thank you.

[silveradept]

I think that the advice on how to reckon with a problematic creator (or a toxic fandom) is always useful to have on hand for following, because it seems like there's an inevitability toward your fandom becoming toxic or problematic. Being able to have discourse, rather than The Discourse, seems like one of the best things that can be done when the problematic label comes around to say hi.

[amovingtarget]

Hello :)

[madeline_gwydion]

Hey there. :-)

You seem like a really nice and thoughful person. Plus we like some of the same fandoms, apparently (Rivers of London, Almost Human, Yuri on Ice).

Your fandom history says that RoL fandoms OTP is your NOTP, so, if I add you, would you like me to put stuff I write about them under a labeled cut?

[pink_ink]

hi there! i really enjoyed reading your intro post, it's so well-thought out.

i agree wholeheartedly with the point you made about having honest conversations about narratives/stories and the implications they carry. at the same time, harrassing people is never okay.
from my short forray into tumblr, i also got the sense that a lot of antis are scared kids. i'm also a bit wary of how "anti" is sometimes used to dismiss valid critiques of fandom... anyway, i think having thoughtful discussions and learning from one another is one of the best ways we can use ~the internets~ tbh

i'm also an old and currently in what i call the gender limbo haha. i haven't found a gender designation i'm 100% comfortable with. currently i'm going with non-binary.

and i saw you listed brooklyn 99 & how to get away with murder as your interests. which. YES. b99 has such great comedy, i love their humor. it's so silly at times, but also very well thought-out (the jokes tend to punch up!). and i am very much in love with viola davis.

TL;DR i have subscribed ^^

ps. i'm planning to edit my intro post after reading yours to include a note about tagging and fandom discussions! i'll credit you, if that's okay?

[spikedluv]

possibly autistic? in this way where I thought that was just the rest of my family until it dawned on me that it would kind of explain a lot?

I have been feeling this, but afraid to speak it out loud in case it sounded insensitive? I keep reading posts by/about autism and I keep going, haha, I do that too! And after a half dozen of those I'm going o_O and wonder if it's something I should look into or just let ride.

white and making an effort to educate myself about my privilege & US American and trying to be less of an oblivious jerk about it

Also, yes, same to both of these.

[scytale]

Hey! I've really enjoyed reading your Snowflake posts and poking through some of your older posts. I subscribed. :)

I think you make a good point about antis being scared kids -- I think as a society, we are all still trying to figure out the rules for this new social media world we live in and seeing all the fallout, and it's definitely going to be harder for teens. And the media we have isn't really conducive to conversation and listening and empathy these days, unfortunately.